We all have someone in our lives who keeps being issued reality check after reality check, only to kick it back stamped indignantly with "INSUFFICIENT FUNDS" or "ACCOUNT CLOSED". We shake our heads in amazement as they meander through life totally oblivious to the truth of their situation...almost as if they are operating under the illusion of an alternate existence. We grimace at their disconnect, thinking to ourselves, "Boy, how clueless can you be?" While there are many reasons we sometimes fail to accept an honest and accurate assessment of a certain circumstance, the main factor is our reluctance to embrace the painful aspects of such a reality check. While we may be thinking this crutch isn't one we ever use, deeper reflection might reveal that we all pull out our ink stamp at times and return checks to the issuer instead of processing them.
After all, sometimes we simply don't have the energy required to do all that work, right? If we can keep rejecting a check that tells us that our husband doesn't want to be married to or doesn't love us anymore, even though all of the signs point toward that, for example, we avoid what comes with that. However, if we accept a reality check that is actually sound, it changes everything, and demands a shift in consciousness, perspective and behavior. When a reality check clears, it alters the balance in our account and grants the knowledge and clarity that cause us to evolve, grow and affect our own destiny. We can no longer stand in the same place and do the same thing. It means change. This is why we resist...why we argue, defend and rationalize away any reality that requires us to dig deep and take action. The question remains...is this really living?
Being stuck in a cycle of resistance to this kind of change can often become permanent. We begin to believe the story we tell ourselves and, eventually, find it virtually impossible to accept reality if it conflicts with the beautifully composed universe we have created. If it is true, however, that we only have one shot here on earth it is important for us to acquire the personal strength necessary to embrace uncomfortable realities and process them more efficiently. Living life with a mailbox full of bounced reality checks is no way to honor the opportunity. We are meant to live life...not hide from it. We are meant to make mistakes...to fall and recover...to learn and grow...to blossom, not to wrap ourselves in layer after layer of comforting falsehoods. We will never be able to know what possibilities lie in wait until we develop the courage to shed and release that which keeps us wasting precious time bound to inaccurate realities. When we can emerge from periods of denial, no matter how small, the journey begins toward an authentic, genuine life.
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Erin Williams, Houston Life Coach
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